A Valentine’s Conundrum

V-Day is a week away. Now’s the time to figure out which of your booty calls won’t read into it if you ask her out to an actual dinner so you guys can get that sweet deal at Sullivan’s. Just be careful, dudes. Girls are crazy this time of year. Not the good kind.

There’s single, then there’s bitter, then there’s pathetic. You do not have to be all three if you’re not into Valentine’s Day.

Z and I don’t do Christmas, and this year we tried to do Valentine’s Day. I just couldn’t wait that long to give him his gift, so I handed it to him in a very un-romantic paper wrapping. We tried. It’s nice to have someone to buy a present for, even if the suspense killed me.

The first time I was single on Valentine’s Day, it was hard for me to cope with the adorable couples and their cheesy, pre-packaged garbage, er, gifts. I realize now that I was just bitter about being alone. It didn’t really have anything to do with hating heart-shaped things. I was just jealous. The second time I was single on Valentine’s Day, I learned to let it go. I was indifferent in a live-and-let-live way. Had some friends over for “Black Hearts’” dinner, and had a great evening.

I guess when I hear my single friends say how much they hate Valentine’s Day, I get it. I just feel that they’re lying and that they would be excited about V-Day if they had a sweetheart to share it with.  Or, at least they’d be indifferent to it if they were secure in their singleness.

Maybe you really do hate the day, and maybe you think that your snarky attitude about it will make you seem more attractive to the single dudes at the bar. I’m so independent. I’m the cool girlfriend. Date me!

Just a warning, this could backfire. You might end up attracting a guy, but if he feels the same way about V-Day, you might be pretty depressed on your third anniversary when he doesn’t even bother to write a personalized message in the card. “Love, Frank,” just might not do it for you. You’ll break up with him because he just wasn’t very romantic, you know?

Single or taken, there’s the classic  “I don’t need a special day for someone to hand me a bouquet of flowers. They should be that good to me the rest of the year.”

Yes. This is true. But are you that good to someone all year? Maybe he doesn’t need a special day to show you how much you mean to him… but what about you?

What random act of kindness have you done for your dude? What about the other people in your life? Do you send your mom cards outside of her birthday and Mothers’ Day? What about your dad? If you claim that you hate the “forced affection” aspect of the day, don’t be a hypocrite about it.

Maybe pink and red aren’t your colors, and chocolate isn’t your thing.  But let’s all learn from the point of Valentine’s Day, shall we? Let someone know that they’re special to you, whether you do it on February 14th or August 6th.



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